Adventures in Internet Dating V1.0

(Unedited, real letters from prospective Princes via a popular dating site. This is my favorite of the exchanges. I would like to tell you that I made this up for comedic value, but I swear on all that is holy this is exactly how the exchange went. Hold on to your britches….)

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Dear Cinderella:

I saw your profile and wow are you beautiful! Green eyes and black hair – even though that’s sinonimous with witches in some cultures, I like witches. Can you cast a spell on me? And boy are you funny. I think we could have a really fun date. Will you call me on the phone? Wow, your cool. I like youir pictures to. Do you have any pictures of your feet?

Call me.

Franklindude

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Dear Franklindude:

Wow. Well, thanks? No, I don’t have any pictures of my feet. Is this the point where I should ask if maybe you have any foot fetishes or other interesting little, um, habits I should know about ahead of time? I think I’ll wait a little bit to get to know more about you before we move to a phone call if that’s OK.

Have a good weekend!

Cinderella

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Dear Cinderella:

So your a shoe nut, I like ladies shoe, not on me.. I will tell you somthing eles, I do have a shoe and foot fetish. Hope you dont run away now! I only cross dress on Wed. nights…lol! Hope I made you smile 🙂

Call me.

Franklindude

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Franklindude,

Haha! How funny! Whew – I do feel a little better now I know you were kidding. Seriously, I got a little worried there for a minute. I’ve run into some colorful characters on here, so I’m never quite sure what I’m going to run into. At least I know I’m not going to catch you in the closet like Joe Junior (From the movie While You Were Sleeping – one of my favorites) trying on my shoes!

Cinderella

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Dear Cinderella:

Oh…Did I sound funny? I was actually telling you the truth. I open up to much dont I ? Let me go back in my shell. You are so cool.

When are you going to call me?

Franklindude

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Franklindude:

Oh OK, I’m sorry I misunderstood. Hey, thanks for giving me the chance to get to know you a little bit but I really don’t think we’re a match. Good luck to you though!

Cinderella

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~ by cinderellawasdelusional on May 15, 2009.

3 Responses to “Adventures in Internet Dating V1.0”

  1. hahaha! WOW – book fodder right.there.

  2. […] already know where Franklinguy’s interests reside. I’m shocked to learn he’s still single. Shocked, I tell you. He even listed one of his […]

    • Thanks, Mia! It’s a roller coaster ride, for sure. I actually heard from him about a month ago and he tried to tell me that he had had an aneuysm in his brain and that was why he had treated me the way he had.

      Yeah. Sure.

      New levels of shirking responsibility for his actions but one that was worthy of accolades for effort.

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